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We all have problems and barriers that block our progress or prevent us from moving into new areas. When that happens, consider
We all have problems and barriers that block our progress or prevent us from moving into new areas. When that happens, consider
admin
2017-12-31
66
问题
We all have problems and barriers that block our progress or prevent us from moving into new areas. When that happens, consider the following three ways of dealing with a【B1】______.
One way is to pretend it doesn’t exist. 【B2】______it, deny it, and lie about it. However, this approach leaves the barrier【B3】______. A second approach is to fight the barrier. This often【B4】______the barrier’s magnitude. The more one struggles, the【B5】______the problem gets. The third 【B6】______is to love the barrier. Accept it. Totally experience it. Tell the【B7】______about it. When you do this, the barrier【B8】______its power.
Suppose one of your barriers is being afraid of【B9】______in front of a group. You can use any of these three approaches. First, you can【B10】______you’re not afraid about speaking in public. The second way is to【B11】______the barrier. You could tell yourself, "I’m not scared," and then try to keep your knees from knocking. Generally, this doesn’ t【B12】______. The third approach is to get up and look out into the【B13】______, and say to yourself, "Yup, I’m scared and that’s OK. I’m going to【B14】______ this speech even though I’m scared. " And you might discover if you examine the fear, accept it, and totally【B15】______it, the fear itself also【B16】______.
Remember two ideas: First, loving a problem is not necessarily the same as【B17】______it. Love in this sense means total and unconditional acceptance. Second, "unconditional acceptance" is not the same as unconditional 【B18】______. Often the most effective【B19】______come when we face a problem squarely—diving into it headfirst and getting to know it in【B20】______.
【B17】
In this part of the test, you will hear a short talk. You will hear the talk only once. While listening to the talk , you may take notes on the important points so that you can have enough information to complete a gap-filling task. Then write your answer in the corresponding space on your Answer Sheet. You will not get your Test Book until after you have listened to the talk.
We all have problems and barriers that block our progress or prevent us from moving into new areas. We put boundaries on our experiences. We limit what we allow ourselves to be, to do, and to have.
Problems often work like barriers. When we bump up against one of our problems, we usually turn around and start walking along a different path. And all of a sudden—bump! — We’ve struck another barrier. And we turn away again.
Our problems might include the fear of speaking in front of a group, anxiety about math problems, or the reluctance to sound silly trying to speak a foreign language. We might have a barrier about looking silly when trying anything new. Some of us even have anxiety about being successful.
It’s natural to have barriers, but sometimes they limit our experience so much we get bored with life. When that happens, consider the following three ways of dealing with a barrier.
One way is to pretend it doesn’t exist. Avoid it, deny it, lie about it. It’s like turning your head the other way, putting on a fake grin, and saying, "See, there’s really no problem at all. Everything is fine. Oh, that problem. That’s not a problem, it’s not really there. " In addition to looking foolish, this approach leaves the barrier intact, and we keep bumping into it. We deny the barrier and might not even be aware that we’re bumping into it. For example, a student who has a barrier about math might subconsciously avoid enriching experiences that include math.
A second approach is to fight the barrier, to struggle against it. This usually makes the barrier grow. It increases the barrier’s magnitude. A person who is obsessed with weight might constantly worry about being fat. He might struggle with it every day, trying diet after diet. And the more he struggles, the bigger the problem gets.
The third alternative is to love the barrier. Accept it. Totally experience it. Tell the truth about it. Describe it in detail. When you do this, the barrier loses its power. You can literally love it to death.
Suppose one of your barriers is being afraid of speaking in front of a group. You can use any of these three approaches.
First, you can get up in front of the group and pretend you’re not afraid. You can fake a smile, not admitting to yourself or the group that you have any concerns about speaking—even though your legs have turned to rubber bands and your mind is jelly. The problem is, everyone in the room will know you’re scared, including you, when your hands start shaking and your voice cracks.
The second way to approach this barrier is to fight it. You could tell yourself, "I’m not going to be scared," and then try to keep your knees from knocking. Generally, this doesn’t work. In fact, your knee-knocking might get worse.
The third approach is to get up in front of the room, look out into the audience, and say to yourself, "I am scared. I notice that my knees are shaking, my mouth feels dry, and I’m having a rush of thoughts about what might happen if I say the wrong thing. Yup, I’m scared and that’s OK. As a matter of fact, it’s just part of me, so I accept it, and I’m not going to try to change it. I’m going to give this speech even though I’m scared. " You might not actually eliminate the fear: however, your barrier about the fear—which is what stops you—could well disappear. And you might discover that if you examine the fear, love it, accept it, and totally experience it, the fear itself also disappears.
Applying this process is easier if you remember two ideas:
First, loving a problem is not necessarily the same as enjoying it. Love in this sense means total and unconditional acceptance.
Second, "unconditional acceptance" is not the same as unconditional surrender. Accepting a problem is different than giving up or escaping from it. Rather, this process involves escaping into the problem—diving into it headfirst and getting to know it in detail. Often the most effective solutions come when we face a problem squarely, with eyes wide open. Then we can move through the problem instead of around it. When you are willing to love your problems, you drain them of much of their energy.
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