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  3. It is not surprising that many women complain that their partners don’t listen to them. But men make the same complaint about wo

It is not surprising that many women complain that their partners don’t listen to them. But men make the same complaint about wo

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问题     It is not surprising that many women complain that their partners don’t listen to them. But men make the same complaint about women, although less frequently. The accusation " You ’ re not listening" often really means "You don’t understand what I meant, " or "I’m not getting the response I wanted. " Being listened to means being understood and being valued.
    In my earlier work I emphasized that women may get the impression that men aren’t listening to them even when the men really are. This happens because men have different habitual ways of showing they’re listening. As anthropologists (人类学家) Maltz and Borker explain, women are more inclined to ask questions. They also give more listening responses—little words like mhm, uh-uh, and yeah—scattered throughout someone else’s talk. And they respond more positively and enthusiastically, for example by agreeing and laughing.
    All this behavior is doing the work of listening. It also creates friendly talk by emphasizing connection and encouraging more talk. The corresponding strategies of men—giving fewer listener responses, making statements rather than asking questions, and challenging rather than agreeing— can be understood as moves in a contest by speakers rather than audience members.
    Not only do women give more listening signals, according to Maltz and Borker, but the signals they give have different meanings for men and women. Women use "yeah" to mean "I’m with you, I follow, " whereas men tend to say "yeah" only when they agree. The opportunity for misunderstanding is clear. When a man is confronted with a woman who has been saying " yeah, " " yeah, " " yeah, " and then turns out not to agree, he may conclude that she has been insincere, or that she was agreeing without really listening. When a woman is confronted with a man who does not say "yeah"—or much of anything else—she may conclude that he hasn’t been listening. The men’s style is more literally focused on the message level of talk, while the women s is focused on the relationship level.
    To a man who expects a listener to be quietly attentive, a woman giving a stream of feedback and support will seem to be talking too much for a listener. To a woman who expects a listener to be active and enthusiastic in showing interest, attention, and support, a man who listens silently will seem not to be listening at all, but rather to have checked out of the conversion and gone mentally home.
Both men and women speakers expect their listeners to be________.
选项 A、quiet
B、attentive
C、talkative
D、aggressive
答案B
解析 事实细节题。由最后一段可知，对于一个希望听众安静专注的男人来说，一个给予一连串反馈和支持的女人似乎说得太多了。对于女人来说，她希望倾听者积极、热情地表现出兴趣、关注和支持。由此可见，男性和女性都希望他们的倾听者attentive。故选B。
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